You Never Forget Your First

Rocked by the Granite state

 

Oh yeah baby, right there….

That’s right…

Ooo yes!

Yes!

YES!

I’m Winning!!! I’m Winning!!!

 

Donald Gets His Grove Back…

We are going to make our country so strong. We are going to start winning again. We don’t win anymore as a country. We don’t win on trade. We don’t win with the military. We can’t beat ISIS. We don’t win with anything.

We are going to start winning again. And we’re going to win so much, you are going to be so happy. We are going to make America so great again. Maybe greater than ever before.
– via Washington Post

Cue Bobby McFerrin:

Ooh-ooh-hoo-hoo-ooh hoo-hoo-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Who is Ted Cruz?
A whiny pussy that’s who…
I’m happy
Woo-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Im a winner, I’m a winner!

Ok, maybe that’s not what Mr. McFerrin actually sang….

Hillary Feels the Bern…

Hillary Clinton gets jilted by men, women and pretty much everyone in New Hampshire. Not only did she lose, she lost historically.

You go girl.

Of course, she had a lot of help from her friends:

Ms. Steinem…{e}xplaining that women tend to become more active in politics as they become older, she suggested that younger women were backing Mr. Sanders just so they could meet young men.

“When you’re young, you’re thinking: ‘Where are the boys? The boys are with Bernie,’ ” Ms. Steinem said.
– via www.nytimes.com

And then Madeleine Albright added:

“We can tell our story of how we climbed the ladder, and a lot of you younger women think it’s done,” Ms. Albright said of the broader fight for women’s equality. “It’s not done. There’s a special place in hell for women who don’t help each other!”
– via www.nytimes.com

I think that “special place” is right next to the one where all the misogynists go for telling women what to think, how to dress and what to do. In fact, I think it’s just a short Uber from there.

Kasich Places, Cruz Shows and Jeb! Thinks He Hit the Trifecta…

John Kasich, imperator of Ohio, finished second in New Hampshire and Ted Cruz, pussy, came in third. But it’s Jeb!, a sprout off the old bush, who thinks he won something by coming in fourth.

Jeb! finished sixth in Iowa. Now he’s fourth. With enough money, unicorn glands and pixie dust he might even come in–dare he dream–third?!?

Oh Jeb! You spent $1,150 per vote in New Hampshire. You spent $5,200 per vote in Iowa. (Drunk Note: The amount of unicorn glands and pixie dust spent was NOT reported).

I tell you what Jeb! For $3,500 I will vote for you.

You can send the check directly to me.

Right here on the internet.

I’m right next to the place you go when you announce that you’re suspending your campaign. You can hook up with Chris Christie and Carly Fiorina–she’s the one with her heart beating, her legs kicking.

You’ll know it when you see it.

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